Wednesday, November 19, 2008

ototo...

Ototo... Adiaz has two of them. One grew up along with her, and they spent most of the time together. They shared every games, every cartoons, every quarrels and every food. Now, her first ototo has grew up into a healthy, charming lad. And Adiaz is happy to see that progress.

However, sadly, they are not so close as they used to be back when they were kids. Adiaz's grown ototo hardly spends time or share jokes with her. They do talk, but not often. And it was most of the time felt nothing. Adiaz tried to make the conversation longer and fun, but it seems that ototo is not really interested to listen and to share with her. Her grown ototo now prefers to be with his peers and his kanojo. Well, that is not a big matter (I think), but it frustrates Adiaz because he does not do the same to her. Adiaz tried to be considerate and understanding, but she cannot help feeling envious and dissatisfies towards her ototo's friends. Well, Adiaz refused to sigh and doing nothing. Adiaz wants to try and improve this matter. She knows it will be hard, and she hopes she has the courage and strength to do it.

Another ototo was 12 years younger than Adiaz. And so, that makes him the youngest in the family. This precious ototo didnt grow up with Adiaz. When ototo was born, Adiaz is almost graduating from primary school. And when ototo started his first year in primary school, Adiaz was unable to see him, for she was at the university at that time. Adiaz was jubilant when ototo was born, and she was determined to take good care of him. However, Adiaz didn't have enough time and opportunity to do that. Again, Adiaz felt frustrated. She wants so bad to spend more time with her youngest ototo. She is anxious of her youngest ototo. Adiaz knew he will be alone soon. Her youngest ototo won't have anyone else to play in the house, since his onisan is going to college soon. And he will also be lonely because otosan & okahsan will be busy with their work. Otosan & okahsan is busier now than they were before back when Adiaz was young. They used to held picnic and visit places, but now not anymore. Ototo didn't have many chances to see the world. Adiaz wants to make ototo's world more colourful. Adiaz wants to teach ototo many things. Adiaz doesn't want ototo to be burden by books and extra classes and school's prgrammes and tv shows per se! Ototo needs to be exposed more to the world, not crappy tv shows and thick books per se!

Adiaz loves both her ototo...very much. Adiaz wants them to become a much better person than herself. She doesn't want they make the same mistake as she did. Adiaz has to forget all her dreams, and she has no one to blame but herself. She could not help to feel regret, but she tried hard to ignore it. Now, Adiaz wants her siblings to be wonderful people. That's what Adiaz hope is.

=Adiaz speaks...and at this time, she wants badly to teach her youngest ototo to ride a bike.

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