Sunday, November 16, 2008

Dream on...

Adiaz is losing her mind and conscious. Hmm…what did she do all day? Well…apart from stuffing her noggin with a huge loads of theories n cases n solutions…and also stuffing her belly with food that she didn’t even wanna eat? (haha!)

When adiaz loses her mind…she started to do one thing that is sooooooooooooooo unnecessary n completely wasteful. Oh yeah…that’s it. Adiaz starts to dreammmmmm… All kinds, every species, any type of dream she can think of. Isn’t that so frustrating? Its as though she had nothing else more material to do.

Adiaz is very creative when she dreams. (if only she can be likewise in real life too..*sigh*). Trust me. If you give her a chance to make her dreams to be a movie, that can definitely attract movie addicts. Ahaks! That is when her mind began to think all the sweet stuff and every great opportunity she can have. Adiaz live a great life in her dream. She is able to get all that she couldn’t possibly achieve in the real world she’s living now. She dreams of being the most influential person in the world. She wish she is the most likeable person, the most admired, the bravest, and the most successful. Adiaz often dreams she has the power, special powers like her favourite ‘heroes’ show. Then she can change the word into a much better place (dream on!). And she dreams that she will be living along with a dashing and successful lad. (damn girl! You really think that far huh..!) *sigh*…what to do?

Sometimes, well, most of the time…Adiaz was so happy living in that fantasy of hers that she forgets about the truth. The reality. How much reality bites. (ouch!). Adiaz forgets all the imperative obligations that she needs…that she MUST strive to achieve. When Adiaz realized where she really is, she felt frustrated and disappointed to herself.

How possible can reality serves better that fantasy? Indeed, to dream is one thing that is the most fun, the most enjoyable, the most happy, the most wonderful and the one of the greatest feeling to have, despite that it is only for a short while. But in the end, it comes to this point that Adiaz finds it hard to accept: Reality is so far beyond that. Reality…is a moment, a place where every second is worth fighting for. To get something, you have to fight for it. Unless you put a good fight, you won’t be able to achieve what you targeted in the first place.

And Adiaz, unfortunately, is not a good fighter. And Adiaz envied very much those who were good. There are times when Adiaz does get the fruits, but it’s not the fruit that she aimed in the first place. Honestly, I tell you, Adiaz is exhausted. She is tired of having to face the fact that everyday in her life is a battle, whetherit is a big or a small one. Adiaz knows she sounded pitiful. Adiaz is aware she is being an escapist. Adiaz also knows that she is too emotional most of the time.

Perhaps that’s why Adiaz dreams a lot. All those dreams helps her to be happy once in a while; when she was almost giving up or when she is feeling awful. Those dreams somehow gives her a strange sort of motivation to keep on going. What a strange way. Well, Adiaz IS strange. (haha!).There are many times where Adiaz hopes to escape to a very solitude place with nobody around but herself accompanied by nature, but since she cannot find it here in the world she lives, Adiaz flies to her other world. At least those dreams have found her a tranquil place to ease her sorrow, frustration and disappointed from reality.

=Adiaz speaks…and at this time…she’s worried she cannot carry on her oligations.

No comments: